It’s been a couple of days, and I still can’t quite believe it.
I don’t know what to think. I don’t know what to do. I was so angry with her for years. I thought she’d abandoned us, just left Mom and me and ran off to the first corp that would have her. I saw her once, walking with a bunch of suits from Aztechnology and getting into a limo, and I was so pissed off I thought I would throw up right then and there. That’s when I decided I’d never rely on anyone again, because if my own sister could desert me, how could I trust anyone else?
I was so wrong. So fucking wrong.
She hardly knows I’m there now. She hardly knows anyone’s there except Static. He assures me (via text, of course) that things will get better. Eventually. He swears she knows it’s me and that she still loves me, but that she’s been so … changed … by her years of imprisonment and experimentation that she can’t really interact with meatspace any more, at least for a while. But I come by every day to say hi, even though it tears my heart out a little each time.
I told Mom. She was sober, at least, so she knows. I didn’t tell her everything—I didn’t tell her about the experimentation, or about the scheduled lobotomy (that will fuel my nightmares for years!). I just told her Aya had been kidnapped, and was free now, and was recovering. We cried together a bit. But then I left to get food, and when I came back, Mom was deep in a BTL stupor again. So I went home.
Patched up a couple of Jim’s friends and I’m finally in the black with the gang again. I think I’ll spend the rest of the day in the stillroom; I set a bunch of herbs to dry before we went to Las Vegas, and they’re ready to be made into medicines now. Mike’s been after me to bring some new product in; I guess he’s got some customers who are really into my stuff. Might as well make some legal cred for once.
Maybe Aya will respond to me tomorrow.